12 Tips for Getting More Custody of Your Child

Divorces with children and custody disputes are among the most contentious family law cases. Given how much you cherish time with your children, it's understandable that emotions run high. The legal process may test your patience but try to stay focused on the big picture. Taking small steps can result in a more positive outcome for you and your child(ren). Below are some practical tips that can improve your case for getting more parenting time.

The child is at the center of every custody case. Sometimes, though, it's easy for even the most well-intentioned parents to lose sight of that when they're embroiled in a legal fight. Keeping your focus on doing what is best for your child will help you demonstrate to the court you are suited to have more custody of your child.

Key considerations:

• Process your emotions to effectively prioritize your child's needs

• Avoid exposing children to adult matters

• Maintain normalcy for your child with familiar routines and activities

Demonstrating to the court that your living situation is suitable for children signals you have created a home that promotes your child’s welfare. Your home should:

• Feel safe and secure

• Be reasonably clean and tidy

• Have outdoor space nearby

In some cases, the court may appoint a Child and Family Investigator (CFI) to observe each household, interview the parties, and make recommendations about what's best for the child. The CFI's report can support your case for more custody, especially if he or she finds evidence of a healthy home and a healthy parent-child relationship.

The court considers a solid parent-child relationship when deciding custody, as it indicates your ability to provide emotional support, stability, and a nurturing environment for your child. 

Here are some ways to strengthen the bond with your child:

• Spend quality time with your child

• Actively listen to them

• Maintain a consistent routine

Convincing the court to give you more parenting time or decision-making authority will require you to illustrate how you play an active role in your child’s life. 

• Keep track of their progress in school

• Attend their extracurricular activities

• Establish family mealtimes to connect

We recommend maintaining a detailed record of the time you and your child spend together. Keep a journal. Consider asking teachers, childcare providers, and other individuals involved in your child’s life to testify about your parental involvement. 

It may not be easy, but you have to be a good co-parent. This includes making sure your child knows it's OK to love their other parent. Here's an example of encouraging your child's relationship with their other parent:

When your child tells you about the fun weekend they had with your ex, you can respond, “I am so glad you had a good time with (mom/dad)!”

Fostering the relationship between your child and your ex is particularly important to your case for more custody. It’s a factor in the Colorado’s best interests of the child statute, and it’s a major factor the court will consider.

In addition to creating a stable, safe environment for your children, your house should also feel like home to them. For example, your child should:

• Have their own comfortable space

• Expect to feel at ease

• Be able to entertain their friends

Enjoying a cocktail or glass of wine occasionally is fine, but you do not want your ex to accuse you of being intoxicated around your children. If your ex has a history of making false accusations, you may consider avoiding alcohol during your parenting time. You should seek professional help if you have a problem with alcohol or drugs.

Do not underestimate the power a social media post can have on your child custody case. It is evidence that can help or hinder your case. Social media can prove a pattern of your involvement in your child's life. And it can offer the court some insight into your mental and physical well-being, good or bad.

Social Media Tips:

• Consider taking a break from social media

• Adjust your privacy settings if needed

• Don't post negative remarks about your ex

• Avoid sharing pictures of yourself at the bar

If you are not dating, it isn’t a bad idea to keep it that way until after a new custody arrangement is in place. If you’re already involved with someone, make sure the relationship is healthy enough for your children to be exposed to it. The standard advice is no sleepovers with your romantic partner while your kids are with you until after the custody hearing.

Modifying a parenting plan is not easy. Colorado custody lawyers are an invaluable resource for achieving the best outcome. Your lawyer understands the nuances of Colorado family law and how to utilize them to create an advantageous strategy. 

Your attorney will advise you about various aspects of your matter, such as:

• Evidence that will benefit your case

• Whether a Child & Family Investigator could be worthwhile

• Considering a settlement offer at mediation

A family law attorney will ensure your rights are protected while prioritizing your child’s welfare according to Colorado law.

Colorado courts generally require parties to a custody case to attend mediation first. Mediation can reduce the emotional and financial costs associated with going to trial and preserve or improve the co-parenting relationship.

Mediation isn’t always appropriate, especially in cases where there are claims of family violence or abuse. Learn more about how to prepare for child custody mediation. 

Showing the court your utmost respect will go a long way in proving your case for more custody. This is especially true if your presentation appears in stark contrast to the other parent’s behavior. Here are some quick tips:

• Arrive early so you are on time

• Follow courtroom procedures (e.g., stand for the judge, respond with 'your honor')

• Dress professionally

• Be present (e.g., turn off your phone, practice active listening)

Above all, focus on your child’s needs rather than personal grievances with the other parent. This demonstrates goodwill. 

We understand that the time you have with your children is precious because it is so fleeting. Find out how our experienced Colorado child custody lawyers can help you figure out how to get full custody of the child. Call 303-688-0944 to begin your case assessment.